Alice of Human Sacrifice
by Alice Kim
Summary: Ciel and Sebastian encounters two strange children claiming to be "Alice Hunters" looking for the four Alices that go along with song "Alice of Human Sacrifice." and has asked for Ciel's help. However...who is the next Alice?
1. The Alice of Nothingness: Intro Part I

Hello all! I have re-written this story because I wrote it a longgg long time ago and I thought it sucked. However, I deliver my thanks to Writers Unknown for his/her review that made me want to try again.

By the way, notice how I don't use Pounds as the currency. Sorry, but the only currencies I'm good with are dollars (America and some other countries) and won (Korean).

* * *

_Somewhere, there was a tiny dream. Such a tiny dream it was._

_No one knew about the dream. The dream began to think,_

_"I don't want to die this way! There must be a way for people to dream of me."_

_The tiny dream thought and thought and came up with an idea._

_"I'll let humans wander into me...then let them create their own world..."_

* * *

"Alicia…." Alex groaned angrily.

"What?" She asked, biting the bar of chocolate.

"…Why the hell did you just buy 20 bars of chocolate from the most expensive store you could find and waste 20 bucks?" He tried to remain calm.

"'Cause I was hungry…," Alicia replied, taking another chunk and handing the rest to her twin, "You want it?"

It's always hard to stay calm in a tough situation. Especially when you're in an alley and have only $10 to live off of because your idiot of a twin sister decided to blow 20 on chocolate.

"I oughta slug you," He threatened.

"What's the use? Anyway, you shouldn't use slang, Alex."

See? Idiot sister.

Alex sighed as carriages rolled by and listened to the clopping of horse hoofs. He leaned on the left wall and slid down to sit. "Forget it."

"I thought so-" Alicia stopped and suddenly jerked her head toward the opening.

Alex heard a loud crack from her neck as she did so. "Didn't that hurt?"

Alicia didn't answer.

"Oi, Alley? You ok?" He got up and waved his hand in front of her face.

She pushed his hand aside and sprinted over to a dark blue carriage, abandoning all the chocolate she had wasted their money on.

"Alley! Wha-" He stopped and sighed. It didn't really matter, as long as he would be able to make sense of the situation right away. And with that wild look in her eyes, there was only one answer to his question.

* * *

Ciel sighed as he reopened his letter.

_Dear Earl Phantomhive, the winner of the Funtom Toy Company's Toy Contest has been released. __Miss Delores Hinchey__ has won for her toy idea:_

_Toy idea: a Wii!_

_What it can do: You can play Mario Kart on it!_

_How much should it be: A BILLION DOLLARS!_

_Why children will love it: BECAUSE IT IS EPICCCC!_

_What it is made out of: A TV AND WIRES! AND A ROCKBAND SET WOULD BE COOL!_

"…"

He reopened the next letter:

_Dear Earl Phantomhive,_

_We apologize for the inconvenience. The previously sent letter held the wrong information. We would appreciate it if you came to the company's main branch and contact us there for the real information._

"This is what I get for hiring idiots. And what in the world is a TV?" Ciel sighed to himself.

That's what today was supposed to be about. Sebastian Michealis, his "hell of a butler", had to cancel all plans today because of a retard's mistake. Why couldn't they just send him the real information? Because they were retards. You'd think that they'd be smart because adults like to be pompous and intelligent-like. But the smarter children know better. They have the clear eyes that can look right past a human's heart. Fortunately for him, Ciel was one of them.

Ciel felt a sudden halt and nearly fell over. He reminded himself to invent safety belts later on in life.

"Sebastian! Why did you stop?" Ciel yelled as he climbed out of the carriage and onto the road. "You'll make us late and make the people in carriages behind us angry!"

(A/N: Today, we have an early traffic report that is pissing the world over.)

He saw Sebastian in his coat as usual, glaring at two adolescents in front of the carriage.

One was a girl with shoulder length, and a bit shaggy blonde hair and startling electric blue eyes. She wore a dingy, light yellow dress and tan overall kind of dress over it, as if she were a yellow-tan maid without the money to get frills. She had a white (actually, more of a gray because of how dirty it was) ribbon with two ends sticking out in the air. She was small, but a little taller than Ciel himself. She would've looked cute if it weren't for the constant glare at Sebastian.

The other was similar, only he was a male. He had tangled, dirty blonde hair with some tied into a little ponytail on the back of his head. He wore a t-shirt (were those even in fashion?) that was a light yellow and short overall pants that were a light tan as well. He had a white cloth knotted around his neck as though he were a sailor and that looked dingy too. He looked nervous and confident at the same time which gave him a weird look of a small frown and pressed lips.

But why did he give a damn?

"Move it," Ciel ordered them.

* * *

Whoever Alicia had expected to come out of that gaudy carriage, it was not a little boy in black and blue. He had a hat with a little blue ribbon on it, a cape, and a cane. The weirdest thing was that over one of his blue eyes was an eye patch. Like he was a pirate.

She quickly regained her composure and continued to be threatening. She could feel that man named Sebastian saw her surprise, even if it were blind to her own brother. Maybe it was obvious because of the smirk on his face she desperately wanted to slap off.

Alex slowly walked over to her and cupped his hand around her ear, "Alicia, did you find an Alice?"

"I'm not sure. I just…it's like an Alice, but it isn't at the same time. Maybe he's an Alice that isn't the First," She tried to explain, but she didn't really want to with a man who looked like he had super hearing right in front of her.

The man blinked and Alicia finally noticed his eyes.

Red.

"Alex!" She pointed out his eyes with her own eyes.

He noticed and nodded.

"What should I do, Young Master?" He asked the little boy.

Alicia tried to stifle a laugh. Normally, it's the boy talking to the elder Master (except he wouldn't call him "Young Master"…)!

She finally found the sense to speak, "NAME!"

All three heads turned to her, "What?"

"What is your name?" She asked again.

"I am Ciel Phantomhive!" He declared. "And who may you be?"

"I am Alicia," She replied confidently.

"Alicia…?" Ciel waited for more.

"Just Alicia! God, why do people expect last names all the time?" She rolled her eyes.

He frowned. "Get out of the way."

"Nah, really, there's more sun when I'm out here," She replied, pulling out a rifle out of nowhere.

He didn't flinch. "Sebastian." Was all he said as though a butler could save his life.

Which he could.

"Please lower your gun," Sebastian asked nicely.

Ciel snorted.

And so did Alicia.

"So Ciel, have you seen any chick with red eyes?" Alicia spat on the ground.

"Chick?" Ciel must have had a picture of a chicken in his mind because he made a face that read, "Ew, red-eyed chickens would be demonic. And scary."

"A GIRL," She pronounced as though he were an idiot.

He blinked, "What reason would there be for you to look for a red-eyed girl?"

Alicia sighed.

"Because," she replied, irritated, "We kinda have to kill her."

* * *

And that is the first chapter folks!

Sorry, I kinda have to get the basics out of the way…


	2. The Alice of Nothingness: Intro Part II

Not bad, pulling out two chapters in one day!

Brownie points go to me!

BTW, I made the lyrics. It's not very accurate, but I wanted it to rhyme. If anyone wants to use them, I would like to be asked permission and be granted some credit for my poor brain here!

* * *

_The first Alice was the Spade of Wonderland_

_Bravely walking, sword in her hand._

_Cutting down countless things she made a bloody path_

_Whatever came in her way was forced to feel her wrath._

_That first Alice is trapped in the trees._

_Locked and imprisoned despite her pleas._

_Unless you count the path of blood she had made,_

_Proof of her existence gradually had fade._

_The second Alice was the Diamond of his land,_

_He sang songs he wrote with his musical hand._

_People would come and hear and fall for his melody,_

_He believed that being famous was the key._

_That second Alice was a rose._

_Shot by a madman, yet death he would oppose._

_Then the petals fall, he no longer rendered._

_Who is he? What was he? No one could remember._

_The third Alice was quite a pretty lass_

_Beautiful a maiden and attracted all of the lads._

_They crowned her Queen and she ruled their world._

_She was kind but quietly, her true colors began to unfurl._

_That third Alice was a Queen._

_Twisted and contorted by a strange, warped dream._

_"My face won't last and I shall fade!"_

_She wears a mask and still rules her world, to this very day._

_If you walk a yellow path by the castle of Clover,_

_Two twins of Heart you shall discover._

_Tea under a rosebush and a letter from the Queen:_

_Twins of Heart may come as they please!_

_The fourth Alice were twins of the Heart._

_Brother and sister; they would never part._

_Coming through countless doors, they just had come._

_Unlike the others, they thought it was great fun._

_Beautiful sister, intelligent brother._

_They were trapped in one place and __drew close to the First__..._

_Brother and Sister wouldn't wake up; __lest not by command__._

_Forever they will wander in Wonderland!_

_So..._

_Who's the Next Alice?_

* * *

"…What are you implying?" Ciel asked.

"Maybe I'll answer if you answer my question," Alicia scowled.

"You simply sang a song. Four to five people named Alice and each of them died their own horrific deaths. What do you mean?" Ciel raised his eyebrow.

"Alicia, you aren't being fair," Alex nudged her. "You gave him no explanation to the Alices."

"That is right. Now move it."

"Shut up, shorty," Alicia still had the rifle aimed at his head.

By now, many people were out in the streets, wondering what all this commotion was about. Upon seeing a young noble and his butler being ambushed by two children in public and broad daylight, most didn't really care. They assumed that the kids were stupid for choosing such a wrong time and place to attack. The rifle was what they were really worried about.

No need to worry Scotland Yard about this. But it attracted the local police which were basically people in dire need of amusement and sense of justice. No matter what the crime, even if there were no crimes involved, they would take action.

Ciel sighed and told them for the third or fourth time now to move along. They remained glued to their position.

"Your demon of yours should understand," Alex whispered to Ciel. He gave off a demonic aura and his bright blue eyes began to glow an eerie purple. Although it was a whisper, Ciel could still hear it and he flinched.

Ciel turned to Sebastian who bore an "OF COURSE!" expression.

He leaned over to the little boy and whispered to him, "Let them into the carriage. See what they want. Alice Hunters won't stop at anything to meet their goal, even if it is as small as talking to you. Call when they begin to get violent."

He scowled at the thought of Sebastian telling him what to do, but he was already late enough as it is. Ciel refused to go through another round of "embarrass those who mock you" when he came up late at night and the idiots would start lecturing him about being responsible when he was the one who held their fate/jobs in his hands.

"Give up the gun to Sebastian and get in," he told them and climbed back into the carriage.

Alicia was surprised by his offer and actually took it. Silent Alex followed.

* * *

"So let me get this straight…"

"Yes?"

"You two are from a different world."

"Dream," Alex corrected.

"Call yourself Alice Hunters," Ciel continued.

"Yes…"

"Are looking for five people who are to be the next Alices."

"Yep."

"And spent $20 buying chocolate."

"It was Alex's idea."

"Hey!"

Ciel shook his head, "What an unbelievable story you have come up with. Now what do you two really want?"

"We want to find the First Alice and kill him or her off. The so called 'dream' in this song created a world where people can make their own world and end up dying because of their obsession," Alex corrected again. "We believe that if the Alices die upon the Earth before disappearing to their Wonderland, the 'dream' will fade."

"Fade then what? Everyone will find candy on their doorsteps?" Ciel rolled his eyes.

"Fade and they will be no more. Every year, five people suffer and die in painful and nasty ways. Their family grieves and become insane themselves because when Alices die, they don't die normally like humans do. They channel their petty sorrows and fear into people they loved, hoping that they will come to help," Alicia replied, pulling out a bar of chocolate.

"I thought you left that in the alley! WAIT, DID YOU JUST SNEAK A BAR OF CHOCOLATE IN YOUR POCKET AND LEAVE THE REST BEHIND?" Alex hollered.

"Yeah, so?" She unwrapped it and took a bite.

"I swear, one of these days, I will wring your neck off and-"

"Awww! I knew we were twins, right from the beginning!"

"Don't you act like that was your discovery, the birth certificate said so!"

Ciel sighed (gee he's sighing a lot…) and asked, "What makes you think that the Alices are in London?"

"'Cause the Original Alice was the daughter of an English nobleman and grew up here," Alicia said in a dull tone, "DUH. As the story goes, all the other Alices were raised or born here and died here."

The carriage now pulled itself to a slow halt and Ciel walked out. But before doing so, he asked them one last question.

"What makes you think that the Alices were suffering?"

The two stared at him.

"Because we can hear them screaming all the time!" They both said automatically with grins on their faces.

* * *

Really short chapter here! I might have forgotten some parts, but I'll try to add them as I go along. Please don't expect greatness from me: I'm human and make lots of mistakes! Thank you for reading!

~Previously Kai, now Kanna, but always will be Kai


	3. The Alice of Nothingness: Intro Part III

I hate school. I mean, I used to enjoy it, but suddenly, it became a living Hell! There's this one teacher who thinks that on the first day of school, we have to be perfect and know everything by heart after the first time she says it. Her name is Mrs. Bitch. No, not really, but she should have married some dude named Mr. Bitch.

Of course, I won't tell you which grade I am in right now, but if you guess correctly, I'll post it. Then again, you're probably not interested anyway…

I'll stop now; I didn't make this story to complain about my woes.

HOWEVER, I completely forgot about disclaimers and I will do so right away:

Kuroshitsuji does not belong to me. Neither does Alice of Human Sacrifice nor VOCALOID. A VOCALOID is a voice synthesizer which can be used to create on original song without using your own voice. For more information, there's always this thing called the Internet (which I assume you should be on right now...).

This A/N is too long.

* * *

Ok, so that was kinda creepy. Ciel shivered at the thought.

Exactly how many extremely close identical twins (that even looked alike although they were different genders and wore different clothes) that would smile all creepy about another person's suffering?

He had Sebastian tend to the carriages and if anything happened to him…well, then he could come up and proclaim his "one hell of a demon" speech. It was kind of amusing to see that people did not get the inside joke while he did.

So what about the twins?

Alicia stayed with his butler because she didn't want to be in a boring old office and would rather be with his horse. Which might have been a good choice considering her foul mouth and sarcastic behavior, along with her extreme energy that did not allow her to stand in one place for more than three seconds. In fact, Ciel assumed that she moved a lot in her sleep.

Alexius, on the other hand, stayed with Ciel because Sebastian had insisted. Ciel did not mind his attitude very much; he seemed to be the strong and silent type. Also, he didn't look as dirty and beggar-like as Alicia. That is to say, if beggars had decent clothes. He was the practical one of the pair (though if he really were practical, Ciel believed that he wouldn't have gone along with Alicia's wild tale).

Then again, Sebastian was real. Sebastian was a demon. Sebastian was not a bed-time story that would scare children to behave. For all he knew, there could be a God in the world, looking down upon them and angels flying around his head, telling him to abandon Sebastian, be a good little boy, and run off back to the cult that had ruined his childhood.

Maybe he was looking too into it. He would wait for something to happen. Yes, that was it, if he waited, something was bound to happen. And when it did, Ciel could finally believe them and he'd probably get a letter from the Queen asking to help get rid of the Alices. Of course, that is only if it were something that would come up in the news, the Queen wouldn't call them Alices, and he'd have inside information on them.

_Wait._

Ciel stopped walking abruptly at the strange new voice in his head. Alexius bumped into him because he was observing the entire hallway of the Main Office.

"Earl?" He asked.

_How do you know if later isn't too late? You should know best that the world doesn't always give you a second chance. _

"Earl, are you ok?" Alex asked, looking worried now.

_Those pitiful Alices are forced into their own "paradise". Into their own "Wonderland". What if one of those Wonderlands were to expand and force all humanity under the rule of one Alice in his or her Wonderland? What would you do then? You'd be too late. You'd suffer as well. Yo-_

"Earl."

Ciel felt hands covering his ears.

"Alexius?" Ciel turned his head a little.

"Don't listen to that voice. It is the voice of the Yume.

"Yume?" Ciel pushed his hands away.

"Yume. As in '_Ima yume miteru?'_ It means 'Am I dreaming?' in Japanese. Alice Hunters use that as a term to describe the voice of previous Alices. They too wish for Alices to extinct. If there are no more Alices, there is no more suffering. However, they do not go to Heaven or Hell."

"I have plenty of questions for that. One: why use a Japanese term when Alices are English?" Ciel turned to face him completely, but he wasn't there.

"The Original Alice learned Japanese, so it is part of our training," Alex's voice replied to him from behind.

"Which leads me to my next question," Ciel scowled and turned again. Not there.

"There are more of you so-called Alice Hunters?"

"Yes."

"Another: if there is no Heaven or Hell, what does death lead to?" Ciel stopped turning all over the place.

"Death leads to Nothingness where a sinner is completely alone. However, the pure has the privilege to create their Nothingness to one thing they have always wanted in the entire world. Death is nothing but another Dream. As us Hunters are also from Dreams. Reality is basically the life in the Dream. Nothing is really real."

"Do not be philosophical with me!" Ciel turned one last time.

Alexius had those flaming purple eyes again. Ciel did not flinch, but scowled harder. "How is it that I am hearing the voice you insane 'Alice Hunters' hear?"

"Hearing the voice," He responded coldly, contradicting his character. "Is a sign that a different creature from a different Dream believes us and we have agreed to let them help us."

* * *

"So, how many of you are left, _Sebastian_?" Alicia giggled.

"Our race is doing well, thank you," Sebastian replied politely.

Alicia burst out laughing. But it wasn't her usual happy laugh. It was a cold, cruel 'kyahaha' kind of laugh.

"Look at you! You are so lowly! You feed a human, you do his laundry, you clean his messes, you kill only upon command, and you lick his feet! How low can you sink until you finally become no more than the dirt under mankind's feet?" Alicia screeched and pointed at him.

"Miss, you are scaring the horse. Please refrain from yelling," Sebastian replied simply, picking up a bundle of hay and moving it to the corner of the stall.

"Oh no Sebastian, I just find this so damn funny! You were named after the old _dog_ of a child's family and do all his dirty work. Which is a lot considering the name of Phantomhive!" She fell over laughing like a lunatic.

"I see your ability to read people's time has not changed."

"I can do much more than that! That's like the first talent I recognized!" She spat at his feet.

"Yes, that's right, you Alice Hunters are proud of mutating," He nodded solemnly.

She gave him a death glare that would literally kill a person, but would do no harm against a demon. No lasers included.

"That's right," She snapped. "What you call mutating is what we call obtaining more abilities to find the Alices. Do you know how long we've been trying to kill them off? Huh? Do you? Do you? Do you? Didn't your mommy ever teach you history, or did little Phantomhive have to do that for you? HUH? DON'T YOU KNOW?" She was leaning on the door of the stall now and Sebastian had fully faced her.

"Hn? …I believe it to be about 13,000,000 years now. Not including the day the First Hunter attempted. I've lived long enough to witness that First one," He replied, moving closer to her.

She leaned towards his face, "Bingo, little boy. Try to not tell your elders off. It'll really piss them off."

"Perhaps that is just you. But this had absolutely nothing to do with age, so please try to stay on topic," He replied and swiftly walked back to the horse.

* * *

On the ride home, Ciel looked really tired, defeated (which surprised Sebastian…no not surprised, more like gave him a 'WTF did they do to you?' look), and worn out. Alexius was giving a little smile which also freaked Sebastian out, and Alicia was just Alicia.

"Oh ho ho ho ho!" She laughed. "So the little brat decided to believe us! What a vulnerable little child!"

"Alicia, I didn't fill you in so you could start laughing at the Earl," Alexius frowned a little.

"Oh but, I can't help it! I'm having the best day of my life! First Sebastian, now this! God, you're all killing me! Pa-the-tic~!" She was laughing hysterically.

Ciel did not have the energy to ask if she were sane and sighed as he peered out the window. Rain fell against the glass like bullets.

"Yeah, I'm still sane, thanks. And speaking of bullets, when are you gonna hand my gun back over?" She had finally gotten up and sat like a civilized person.

"Well, as long as you're not a threat, I'll tell Sebastian to give back the gun once we get to the manor," He replied.

The carriage came to a halt.

"Which would be about now."

Sebastian held an umbrella for Ciel and held to it as he walked to the manor's entrance.

Alexius walked out, soaking against the wet rain and Alicia leaped out and skipped to Sebastian. "Gimme my baby back!" she ordered.

Sebastian and Ciel both had a look of sheer horror on their faces, wondering what the hell he had to do with her 'baby'.

"Sebastian, did you-"

"No! I did not!" He exclaimed.

"Dude, I'm talking about my rifle!" She laughed evilly.

Ciel breathed a sigh of relief and choked on his sigh.

"Young Master!" Sebastian proceeded to hit his back.

"Stop hitting me so hard, you're going to break my back!" Ciel screamed at him and ran inside the manor to plop down on his bed and pretend that he was dead.

"I bet you hit him hard on purpose."

"Oh yes, I will be honest."

Alexius came over, asked him to for a towel, and apologized for the puddles on the mansion floor.

"Of course."

"WOW! This place is so small, Alex!" She squealed.

"I know," He smiled.

They both laughed, "We're going to have so much fun here!"

* * *

Ciel sighed at the thought of his day today.

_Ciel did not have the energy to ask if she were sane and sighed as he peered out the window. Rain fell against the glass like bullets._

_"Yeah, I'm still sane, thanks. And speaking of bullets, when are you gonna hand my gun back over?"_

Wait.

When had he asked her whether she were sane or not?

* * *

"Man created language to satisfy the deep need to complain."

I am totally thankful for the dude who invented language.

And btw, in response to that "Oh ho ho ho ho~" Alicia laughed...

DAUGHTER OF EVIL, ANYONE? :D

You know, if there's nothing you have to do today, there's always that little button below that would be helpful for my writing.

You know…review please?

Thank you for reading!

~Kai


	4. The Alice of Nothingness: Final Intro

…

I beg you all to not attack me with any solid objects.

I KNOW I HAVEN'T UP DATED IN A BILLION YEARS AND I AM SORRYY~~!

But I've been depressed and all that shiz so…yea…don't make me suffer any more than I already have.

Again, Kuro doesn't belong to me and neither does VOCALOID. What's Kuroshitsuji and VOCALOID? As Luka says, _Go Google It_

* * *

Ciel woke up with a groggy look and yawned. "What's on the agenda?"

Sebastian looked up from the pot of tea and replied, "I thought you would like to relax after taking in this knowledge about Alice Hunters, so I cleared today's schedule. However, Lady Elizabeth called in to tell you that she will be visiting around lunch."

Ciel groaned. "How perfectly unladylike to invite one's self into another's house."

"That may be true, but that is the privilege of being that another's fiancé," Sebastian replied.

He groaned again in response, "Sebastian, if you want me to 'relax', I can't do so without those two twins in my way…and Lizzy."

"Perhaps I can arrange something, but I assure you, Lady Elizabeth won't be happy."

* * *

"What time is it?" Alicia yawned as she pulled herself out of bed. Her hair was messy as ever but cleaner since Maylene forced her in this white block with a giant hole in it full of water. She called it a "bathtub" but she wasn't the kind of person to name everything she saw…oh look! A 9-ball! I think I'll call it…Cirno.

Alicia stretched in her nightgown as Alex began to roll himself off the floor. Yes, off the floor. No matter how level-headed he may be, he had a hard time sleeping on a soft bed when he'd slept his life away on a hard object called a roof, a branch on a tree, or the floor. Hey, we all have our weird quirks.

"Good morning~!" Maylene randomly opened the door and let herself in.

"STAY AWAY!" Alicia charged toward her in a blur and kicked the maid in the stomach.

"Oomf!" She made a 90 degree angle and fell to the ground.

"Alicia!" Alex, fully off the floor, yelled at his sister for pwning Maylene.

"I'm…ok…." Maylene grunted.

"Oh right, we're in a house…weird…sorry May! It's just a reflex!" Alicia laughed nervously.

"I-I-It'sssss o-o-okaaaaiiii…" she coughed, "You have a strong kick, Miss…"

"Why thank you~!"

"Your cutesy acting sickens me, my dear sister."

"Did you know that by changing one letter, DEAR brother can become DEAD brother?"

* * *

_I hate this. I hate this. I hate this._

_Why…why is it my fault? What did I do that was so wrong that I ended up this way?_

…_No worries now…I can change. I can change my world. I can change it so that this day never happened…_

* * *

"No," Alicia crossed her arms and hissed. "I refuse to work for a human. I will not stoop down to your level."

Sebastian frowned, "Alicia, you can't just stay as a guest forever. There are servants who will be suspicious and other guests who will question your importance upon why you are allowed to stay in the Phantomhive manor when you appear to have no business with the Young Master."

"I don't give a shit! Aren't you just worried about the face of Phantomhive? What if your reputation has a small scratch? It's only a small one!" She snarled as she stamped her foot down.

"However, that small scratch can become infected and destroy the entire face."

"And Alex says _I'm_ the drama queen," she rolled her eyes.

"Speaking of Alexius, he has already agreed."

"What?"

"Speak of the devil-"

"It's true," Alex appeared with his soft, messy hair and pale face. He wore dirty overalls and gloves.

"THE HELL?"

"You should just join. I've invented this awesome new machine that'll change sidewalks forever! I call it a road roller," he smiled faintly.

"There are flowers…flowers and sparkles appear around you…I shall break them…I shall crush those flowers…" Alicia growled with a dark aura. She put her hands on her hips and yelled at him, "YOU CALL YOURSELF AN ALICE HUNTER?"

"Oh come now, even Alice Hunters need a bit of fun," Sebastian smiled seductively.

"Oh don't even try you little-"

"SEBASTIAN! I DESTROYED THE GARDEN AGAINNNN!" Finnian's cry reached their ears, "THE ORANGE TREE…I SNAPPED IT IN HALF!"

Alexius gave an evil grin, "Hey Alicia…the ORANGE tree…"

She was turning red, trying to maintain composure.

"ORANGE. The poor ORANGE tree. The MIKAN tree. Well, it's nothing compared to the beauty of banana trees…I mean, it's only an ORAN-"

"SHUT UPPPP!"

She ran out of the room, leaving behind only a cloud of dust.

Alexius smirked, "I think she snapped."

"YOU FUCKING FOOL FINNIAN! YOU FFF! YOU MUST RESPECT THE ORANGE! RESPECT IT LIKE THE POUCH! RESPECT ITTT!"

"…but she's got the time period wrong…"

"She is what one would call a tsudere, no?"

"Oh yes, a tsudere in the flesh. The kind who respect oranges like Oompa Loompas respect chocolate."

"Oompa…"

"I guess I'm in the wrong period of time as well…" Alexius sighed as he walked out of the room.

"…Alice Hunters…such strange creatures…"

* * *

"Ciel, I came to pla-" Lizzy's squeal was cut short.

"Don't fight in the early morn!" Bard was attempting to pull Alicia away from Finnian who was crying in the arms of Maylene.

"OH YEA SURE, GO CRY IN THE ARMS OF A WOMAN, YOU FREAKING ORANGE-HATER!" She screamed as she flailed her rifle, shooting randomly.

"NO KILLING! NO KILLING IN THE MORNING!"

"IT'S NEARLY LUNCHTIME!"

"ALICIA!" Alex appeared, standing on a table with glorious light radiating from him as he held up a small, thin box.

"IT'S GOD THE ALMIGHTY!"

"God's blond and looks 13 years old?"

"ALICIA, IF YOU STOP THIS…" he held the box up as though he expected everyone to bow down to him, "YOU WILL GET THE ANNOYING ORANGE DVD I ILLEGALLY DOWNLOADED AND MADE INTO A DVD FROM ALL THE EPISODES ON YOUTUBE!"

Alicia gasped and tears flew out of her eyes. She ripped out of Bard's grasp and kowtowed him, "OH DEAREST BROTHER, I WILL STOP! I SWEAR I WILL!"

Alex tossed the DVD to her and Alicia scampered away to find the nearest TV or computer.

"…"

"Experience is necessary in order to control that demon," he sighed in triumph.

"…" Elizabeth walked out of the mansion and screamed at the driver, "STEP ON IT!"

She was gone before they noticed her arrival and Alicia's screams of "THERE IS NO DVD PLAYER IN THIS TIME PERIOD!"

* * *

Ciel sighed as he tried to avoid all the commotion downstairs by shutting himself in his office.

"Young Master," Sebastian entered with a newspaper in his hand.

Ciel snatched it from his hands and his eyes widened.

_Serial Killer "Spade" on the Loose!_

Fate's die has been cast.

* * *

…Ok, I know that was more of a filler, but I wanted to get that out of my system. I wanted to get the idea of those two working as servants in the mansion while making them cracked up at the same time. Oh, and a tsudere is someone who's mean but warms up to you once they like you better.

The song "Madness of Duke Veromania" is stuck in my head…urg, hentai VOCALOID…

I will try my best to update soon! I'M SORRY ITS SO SHORT!


End file.
